I don’t think it’s necessarily about holding one brother up to a higher standard than the other. Elena’s first impressions of Damon are deeply embedded in her. Everyone else from Bonnie to Caroline (especially Caroline) still think the worst of Damon despite all the things he has done because of those first impressions. The fact that Elena has moved past many of Damon’s crimes is a testament to her. Stefan was the good brother when Elena met him and his descent into evil was a result of saving Damon’s life. He gets a “pass” because Elena believes bad is not his default behavior, because when she met him that’s not who he was. Elena probably feels that if she is not vigilant with Damon he could easily slip back into his bad behavior.

Elena believing Damon is worse than he actually is may be the cause of conflict in their relationship but it is understandable because Damon has a tendency to lash out. And every time he does Elena has to remind herself that he is capable of those things. She becomes wary of him each time.

Yes Elena’s love for Stefan blinds her. That’s how it works. Damon’s fans’ love for him blinds them too. Elena is held up to a higher standard than Damon by many in the fandom. Elena didn’t apologize to Damon after the incident at the Original’s ball and it made her a raging bitch but right after Damon snapped Jeremy’s neck he played it off like it wasn’t a big deal and even lied about seeing the ring. He wanted her to simply get over it too. If Damon had pouted long enough after the ball perhaps Elena would’ve apologized to him too but instead he lashed out by sleeping with Rebekah. I’m not saying Elena is perfect, far from it, but her actions and judgements are understandable from a human perspective and amazingly forgiving. I adore Damon but I try and make it a point not to excuse his actions just because he’s proven himself to be selfless and loving.

True but I was wondering about his past with dating not just because of his bloodlust issue but because he also dislikes the vampire part of himself in general. Being friends with other vampires like Lexi is different than being involved with them. How do you stay emotionally intimate with someone who is a constant reminder of the things you dislike about yourself? Now he gets to tie in the guilt factor of not using his own logic to save her. Being around her as long as she is a vampire will be another constant reminder. As always it will be worked out for them but how he will over come all these issues simultaneously in one season is curious.

The only thing I can think of is that she gets freightened by her lack of control once she kills the preacher so she decides to visit their friend “moderation”. LOL

Judging by his expression the next morning when Elena caught them, I don’t think he did it to get back at her either but that’s what it looked like to Elena. Especially because Rebekah tried to kill her earlier. And I know why fans love Damon, I love him too but I feel like Elena gets crucified for every little thing she does when her actions are, in fact, quite understandable.

Just like Damon acted like a victim when Elena manipulated him into giving her information about Katherine. Look, Elena is definitely not blameless. All I’m saying is that it takes two to tango and when it comes to Damon and Elena, both of them can be stubborn, petty, and hurtful. Blaming Elena for all the problems in their relationship is, I believe, unfair.